Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Dude you were so wasted you thought a fake electric candle was real and tried to light your cig with it. Multiple times.
Your mom has reinvented the use of a ping pong ball.
Randomize
