People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I can only masturbate in one position. It's very inconvenient.
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
My crowning drunk achievement from that night was donating $5 to the Obama campaign.
You're perfect
Did I put a bunch of spaghetti on you and then eat it off?!?
That you did
The Easter sex puns were too abundant
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
Randomize
