You're the host. Of course you wear the diaper. It's like wearing the pants.
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I've been here 11 months and i just realized i have literally never looked at my apartment/roomates sober
he asked me where I was going to school, and then we started having sex, and I answered his question forty five minutes later after we were done. It was the chilliest thing ever.
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
You literally snort drugs up your nose and you’re questioning the brand of the multivitamin right now?
Randomize
