Sry I called you an 8
I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
I just saw an old lady yelling at a dead pigeon for leaving the oven on.
CAUTION: TWINS DO NOT HAVE TWIN PENISES.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Some guy is in my phone as Pat McAwesome.
Every time our eyes meet, I silently summon him to my vagina.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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