He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
hungover at the ER to get half my contact removed from behind my eye. Not the start to the weekend I was hopin for
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
she just stared at nothing and then looked at me and goes, "that's a weird place to put the wall"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Def went to work still drunk... the only comment i got was good to see you drinking more water...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
