i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
i think i have herpe
just one?
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
can we please take bets on how much therapy you'll need in the future?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
I can't figure out how to get this beer bong in my carry on without airport security questioning me as it goes through the x-ray.
He like walks around to open car doors for me. Has already held my hair while I barf and still likes me. What. Is. Happening.
She had one drink in her cleavage and another in her hand. She kept rotating between the two by leaning backward and then sipping the one in her hand.
I just set a bowl of cap n crunch on fire. That high.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
Randomize
