We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
so the x-ray technician didnt buy my story of falling off a curb. she said a fall of that height couldnt snap the bone that way. bitch called me a drunken idiot too. if she wasnt so hot i'd be angry
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
You had to dry your pants with the hand dryer in the bathroom because you "forgot to take it out."
Every time I download Tinder again, I hate myself a little more.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
If wanting to text you my feelings after three mojitos is wrong I don't wanna be right.
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
Randomize
