He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Every pair of shorts I try on makes me look like some kind of powerful lesbian wizard.
That is like, the point of shorts
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
I was in a bad mood so I guilted her into giving me $100 on a weekly basis and now I feel bad but I don't know how to tell her I hustled her
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
I wish drug dealers had sales for the holidays
Randomize
