today's thought: if you're naming your fb album "wEdDiNg dAy!!!!!!" you're too young to get married
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
I have pictures of you taking tequila shots off the front of the police car when the cop wasn't looking.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
I'm just gonna yell "SURPRISE ME" and see what happens. No way this could go wrong
I'm crying and shaving my Bronco playoff beard
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
