My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
