That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
he asked me to hangout with him...and his son
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I don't mean to complain but you could have done a better job of keeping me alive last night
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
How's my date look?
Like a retarded elf
In a good way
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
Something is wrong here. The birds are chirping and I'm not fucking you, I'm not getting head and I don't smell bacon. Why am I up this early then?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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