You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
Drunk him got in a fight with his wife he literally bought a plane ticket and flew to Hawaii. He just called me and asked why I let it happen. From Hawaii hahaha.
I can't believe my vagina just got wished happy new year
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
and then she sorta stared at me like "holy shit" and I looked down and my dog was licking her ass
Ruff night.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I'm, like, this 🤏🏼 close to buying crocs
And you're also 🤏🏼 to never putting your dick inside me again
Randomize