we're blogging at a bar
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
You drunk dialed me and told me to jump out of my second story window so I could give you head. I almost considered it.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
He gave me the "find somebody who wants to date you for who you are" speech while I walked around the house asking people for pants.
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
