My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Just set a new record on Need For Speed at the arcade. Had to enter Tiger Woods as the name.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
Good ideas don't start with we have a bottle of vodka..
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
I promise not to pretend to be Jesus and take the wheel. But to my credit you shouldn't be saying that while I'm that drunk and we are in a car.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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