dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
i fucked some guy last night. i called him nick jonas by mistake. i'm 24.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
oh. oh my god. i just had lunch with my mom with semen still on my face.
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
