There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
whenever music plays i find myself always doing kegels to the beat. its like the new foot-tapping
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
This tequila is so bad I might cry. I won't Throw up but I might cry
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
I was taking a nap and she comes in wo/ pants, gets up on the bed and mounts my face while watching Weeds on Netflix. I'm okay with it, but at least let me wake up first.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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