I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
I was pissed last night bc this girl didn't want to have sex but offered to reimburse me for the condoms. That just made me upset
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
Oh and it took quite a bit of doing, but I managed to wipe my butt with the hat you left in my car
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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