When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Woke up. Found about 20 condoms upstairs. A hole in the couch. Bread on the floor. Going back to sleep.
I just remembered how you stole the slinky from me. Bitch, I will NEVER forgive you.
Randomize
