1. Mark my dj buddy and I spent $1000 on bottles last night
2. We were casually offered narcotics while walking down the street
3. I will still be awake when you start school tmw, cause there's no last call
So if any tells you miami is the same as the rest of america, there are just lying to you
I'm at some bar in brklyn... just made out with a guy named Owen.
He is a pre-school teacher... just sang me a song about weather.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
I'm going to pre plan my black out tonight. I think I'll set a change of clothes out on my bed and unplug the oven.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
SHUT UP I CAN'T HEAR YOU OVER THE SOUND OF UKULELE AND LONLINESS
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
I also point out to everyone that she looks like DJ's gf on Roseanne.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
I pay 3K a month for rent, yet last nite I broke into the back of my building, scaled over 2 tons of garbage in heels and took a dirty freight elevator to my floor just so my doorman wouldn't see how fucked up I was
U know ur prob on camera right?
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
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