you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
We should go out drinking together soon
I'm still not going to have sex with you
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for
Oh my god she just threw up on her dog
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
