all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
At the hospital. Forgot we locked Eric out of the house last night as a joke. Hypothermia's a bitch.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
I’ve got full Covid immunity, blonde hair and great tits! I’m basically unstoppable
Randomize
