the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Just had to throw up on the floor of my car during traffic on the way to work. Car next to me saw both times. Found the downside to having a job right after graduation.
Just so we're clear, that's a yes to the honey, but if you get marshmallow fluff anywhere near my body we are never doing this again
I'm walking home wearing Kermit the frog footie pajamas, carrying a monogrammed shot glass set with my name on it. It's fucking Christmas!
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
You were throwing up and said, "Whipe my face, I must look presentable at all times."
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
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