yesterday i saw a blind man guiding himself into a NYC tour bus... and i thought i waste money
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I would think I was a stalker too if I wasn't myself
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
For a guy who came before his dick was out of his pants, he gave surprisingly good head.
Yeah it got awkward when the two guys we were playing beer pong against realized that I'd hooked up with both of them. Their teamwork declined after that.
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
send nudes
from the living room?
Randomize
