I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
Ok now I cleared out half the bar and Em and I have 5 Jameson shots lined up for you. You have 15 min.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
We created a neighborhood watchdog drinking game
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
It's like my uterus was saying, "hey, you're not pregnant, but imagine if you were!"
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
Randomize
