hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
The bank teller laughed at me....I'm apparently that fucking hungover looking
All I wanted was my $85. Judgement free. But nooooo
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
Get to the bar now. Ryan is single again and every skank on campus that has heard story about his dick is circling like a shark. A cock hungry shark
Want to go to Victoria’s Secret? His fiancée is out of town and I’m going to try and stop the wedding with lingerie and lots adventurous sex
Absolutely! I love a good sexual filibuster!
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