So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
We are winners. And by winners I mean home wrecking sluts
Isn't that what our 20s r for?? Testing the strength of other people's shitty relationships?
Seriously? We dated for 2 weeks. TWO. And I've crushed his soul and put out the light in his dark world? What the actual fuck.
Yeah, well. That's what you get for dating a musician.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
And god said thou shalt never deny free booze. And it was good.
She thought I was dancing but I just couldn't catch my balance for 11 blocks.
Randomize