After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
Your roommate was biting my friend last night. It was weird.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
I want her autograph on my taint
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Also he didn't buy condoms after we ran out last week. Luckily I had one, but I told him he should be more optimistic about getting laid
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
