I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
We left at the same time. You got home three hours after I did and said you got your head stuck in a fence. I can't believe you don't remember this.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
The beauty of getting kicked out of college again is I can fuck my professor's brains out and she can't get fired now
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
