when I scratched it gently some sort of watery looking stuff came out...so then I just stopped thinknig about it.
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
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