Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
Omg he's telling my parents stories about him doing jaagerbombs ... Lord help me
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
i just want to be sober by dinner like is that too much to ask
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
An image of us stuck like that like Pompeii comes to mind. A wonder for future anthropologists
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
Is there a greeting card for "I can't keep being The Other Woman"?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
