and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
I fucking love fucking science majors-- she told me that she wanted to know if her gag reflex got better or worse with alcohol, and that her initial evidence had been inconclusive. So, next few weeks, yeah, gettin blown periodically. All I have to do is keep a log.
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
They thought we spoke German and French even though we just kept repeating "I give to you a cat" and "Are you drunk?"
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
My vagina is very pro this idea
I woke up beside him and almost cried. Then I realized you were on the other side so I knew I hadn't made any bad decisions.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Randomize
