i just woke up to that girl in my doorway. I kid you not. Tan and lime green thong on. peeing on the carpet in the hallway. Then she collapsed. There is a load of towels in the wash. Just thought you should know when you wake up. Gross.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
He walked into the bar right as I was licking the shotglass clean. We made eye contact for way too long..
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
The two of us went back to your place, had sex, peed in cups, then i went home. Literally all i know
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize