it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
It's like there testing me. My dad kept handing me margaritas and saying "you can take it"
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
Hickey on my chest, threw out my elbow and now walking out my shame.
Youre getting too old for this
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
I wish people could trade lives with me for a day so they could see how much better my life is compared to theirs
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
we went to the skate park then back to her house for dinner, and somehow that ended with her making me blueberry pancakes at 2am
Randomize
