his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I feel like I'm in high school again. I'm completely sober and I just gave some guy a handjob to completion.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
a reward? ill think of something
if its not drugs or food I swear to god ill throw a fit
I was so high last night that at one point I kept licking his neck saying he tasted like soap and truffles.
Randomize
