Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
We should have parties more often. I ended up with 90 beers and someone cleaned my toilet.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I didn't really understand how big 10 inches is. Now I know.
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Randomize
