Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
He had a stripper pole in his bedroom. I didn't know whether to be impressed or creeped out.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
How are you not embarrassed to know me. I'm a mess right now. I'm a walking, talking tornado of embarrassment
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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