i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
I've hit an all time low I just sent a boob pict to fat Randall the one I gave a partial bj to a year a a half ago
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
After he finished, he fell on the floor and whispered "finally satisfied"
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