You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
I'm still in my ugly sweater and underwear drinking coffee next to a plate of assorted treats we stole from the party. I got a new sweater by the way, its shoulderpad-y and looks like a news anchor got thrown up on by Liberace. I'm pretty proud.
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
I guess your brother-in-law will have his day in the sun tonight after you leave. By that, I of course, mean he's gonna suck liquor milk out your sister's tits.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
But really, someone with a penis give me attention before I start posting nudes on Instagram.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
