Is it weird i consider You Sexy Thing our song?
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
We started a mustache riot at white castle at 4 in the morning. Will explain in detail.
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
I asked him to sing a song so he couldn't hear me throwing up as he was holding my hair
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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