what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
