well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
He texted me for a bootycall at 2:00am so I rolled outta bed and shaved my legs but then he decided he wasn't coming over...he lost his bootycall privileges
I'm alone drinking at the bar and the titanic theme song is on. This won't end well.
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
A blind guy just told me that even he could see i was gay and encouraged me to chat up the girl behind that counter bc he thinks we'd make a cute couple. Are all Canadians this helpful?!
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
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