The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
The stripper told me she had been working there for eight years, then got mad when I asked if she was trying to make it into mangment. Awkwardest lap dance
if you were drunk and peed in your friend's washing maching, would you send an "i'm sorry" text or say nothing at all?
all hypothetical of course
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
Cuz its complicated and I hate complicated and I miss your penis
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I have the best idea for a new business. It's going to be called "Lamb-Scape". We are going to cut lawns using lambs. You just put 5 or 6 on a lawn and they eat the grass #allnatural
YOU SAID YOU WERE OUT OF POT
..........
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
I need a fucking roommate.
You need a fucking babysitter.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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