Words of Wisdom: ordering a pitcher of whiskey cokes, putting a straw in it, and calling it your drink is not socially acceptable
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
dude, i turned on the light and asked if they were ok and they STILL didn't stop. Most determined sex EVER.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Also-when I die, I want it to be with my arms above my head so that when rigor mortis sets in, my breasts are perky.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
My life is in shambles. Just made a grilled cheese in the microwave on a hot dog bun
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