If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
awoke with 47 plastic lawn flamingos in my bed and on surrounding floor. explanation?
you said they were your minions of evil that protected you from ferrets.
I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
Managed to convince my mom that I had been home for 3 hours sleeping on the couch downstairs and this t-shirt was your dads. I am SUCH a fucking boss.
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I got inside last night via doggy door
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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