whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
Im going to bring a boy home tonight, and not tell him that I have my period. So when he tries to fuck me, I say no, and look really classy. Then he thinks I'm marriage material. So I give him head.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
And with me just getting pulled over and you maxing your card out on tennis balls I don't know if we can afford it
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I feel like my map app knows I'm hungover and is strategically not driving me by fast food places so I cannot stop
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
