plans for tonight: dress up like pirates, drink a bottle of mad dog and watch the sorostitues across the street get naked. and yes, the mad dog part is already in play. hurry the fuck up. i look like a loser doing this alone.
so i saw this homeless guy this morning yelling at a pay phone like chewbacca.
That's what you get for being in filth-adelphia.
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
I peed in front of kids, unfortunately
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
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