i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I have glow sticks stuck to my boobs and a missed call from the 911. I'd say last night was a success.
Would it be weird to jack off in the hospital?
We met some guy at the beach, and dug a hole with him. He invited us to "come back at night and smoke a blunt in this hole"
When confronted with a choice of going home or fucking the band ALWAYS FUCK THE BAND!!
In another note. Thanks for making me get a vibrator. For real.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
