ya know if you hadnt broke up with me, that porno we made wouldnt have a 3.3 rating on youporn right now...
This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
I woke up and someone had put toast at my feet. I was SO. HAPPY.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
You grabbed my dick don't call me son
Randomize
