i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
I just googled if crying burns calories
I DON'T CARE LET'S GET DRUNK AND GO. I STRAIGHTENED MY HAIR DO THIS FOR ME.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
FYI you are now my emergency contact at plan parenthood
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
