your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
This is my gift to your gina
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Your cousin just directly asked you for nudes
My boobs are hoarders, they steal food and hide it. Greedy bitches.
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
Randomize
