Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
he wanted me to put the condom on for him. I was high and couldn't figure it out.. so instead we played xbox.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Are you texting, crying and driving?
And missing part of my eyebrow. Correct that is the description one would give of me at the moment.
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
i definitely signed you up to receive text message notifications from a jukebox last night. Not even sorry.
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