she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
but instead of smelling like hand cream and homemade cookies, she smells like a yeast infection.
People were autographing me. I'm like the spring break yearbook
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
